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[26 Aug 2005|10:37pm] |
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mood |
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Mars Volta - The Widow |
] |
Today I am eating cereal. :D Yay brown sugar mini-wheats!
I hate how I always make a point of mentally highlighting things I should write about, and that I forget them by the time I get home.
One thing I did want to mention is the plant on the windowsill.
On the black sill of a large window sits a single pitiful-looking plant. Its tray is full of tepid tea-coloured water. It droops miserably despite the sunlight that seems to- not pour- perhaps ooze is a better word- through the windows fogged with condensation no matter the outside humidity, with tiny rivulets that remind me of broken capillaries under translucent, paper-thin skin. The leaves curl under on the edges, brown and dry, and its stem leans like it bears the weight on its shoulders- er, leaves. Walking past it... I want to cry.
And maybe do some photosynthesizing.
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| . . . |
[25 Aug 2005|05:16pm] |
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mood |
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 giddy |
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music |
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Wicked - For Good |
] |
I are skype whore extraordinaire, eh?
Nothing much eventful has been going on lately... school, Jon, skype, Jon, home life, Jon.... did I mention Jon?
Right now I feel
Just like a leaf on a breeze...
Who knows where it's blowing?
Who knows... where I'm going?
I find myself somewhere I
Never thought I'd be...
Going 'round in circles
Thinking about you and me
And how do I explain it when
I don't know what to say?
What do I do now?
So much has changed...
Nothing I have ever known has made me feel this way...
Also, my favourite denim jacket attacked me today. I slid down onto my knees on top of my jacket and a button gouged into me right below my left kneecap... it's beyond me how it cut so deep and drew blood, since afterwards I checked every button myself and discovered them perfectly blunt, smooth, and rounded.
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| Thanks a lot. |
[23 Aug 2005|05:48pm] |
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mood |
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 aggravated |
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music |
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Dustbunny Nation - Been Lucky |
] |
Got the first letter from the school this year- addressed to "The Parents of Robyn Robertson". I assumed it concerned me (and I was right) so I opened it. No big deal- just my HSAP results saying I had completed the test with a passing grade (nothing specific stated- just a "Hey, you didn't fail! Go you!"). I left it opened on the kitchen counter because I figured my mom would want to see it.
As soon as mom gets home (my father, being a lazy "self-employed" bum, was already home), I hear screaming of my name from downstairs.
What.
the.
fuck.
My father is yelling about how I opened the mail addressed to them, and my mother's just sort of standing there rolling her eyes. I counter with the fact that whenever I have mail from the school addressed to ME, they open it. Even when it's not from the school sometimes; letters and packages from penpals and etc. Jackass says something along the lines of "It's our mail if it comes to our mailbox!" and I just flipped on him. The only reason I open mail from school addressed to my parents is because it concerns ME. I don't expect to have to treat it the same way for them, and have to watch out for all mail addressed to me. What the fuck if it's got your name on it- half the time, it's MY test results, MY interims, the things I care about. I cheerfully reminded him that tampering with the mail was a federal offence, and that he'd be in trouble if he ever did it again. He came up with a bunch of shit from last year and the year before, mostly involving dishonesty + bad grades.... this really set me off.
It is barely two weeks into a new year. I am doing my fucking best to change. I have done every assignment since the beginning, taken notes, made an effort to pay attention, and written down assignments in my agenda- and I get countered with that shit, which really just upsets me after all the work I'm putting in to improving. It ended up with me telling him, in somewhat nicer words, "Thanks for that tremendous show of faith in my character, jackass, and fuck you very much." I was storming back up to my room to finish my call when he picked up a brochure from a military academy and remarked jokingly to my mother,
"Maybe we should send her to one of them, dress her up in a hat and uniform and teach her some life lessons."
Fuck you. I know what life is. I live it. And, even at the age of fifteen, I've learned a hell of a lot more than you have, dancing through life on your bubble of air and social status.
I said "I'd slit my fucking wrists before I got sent to one of your neo-nazi conformist boot camps,"
and he just laughed.
He has no clue just how serious that statement was.
Oh yeah! And the Oracle I laptops got here today, and my friend Alex might be transferring into my class. ^__^
And Marc, I know you'll end up reading this eventually; the situation you're in sucks right now. Things will look up though, emo-boy, so just hang on until you can find a surer grip or something entirely else to be steady on all together.
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| Oops. |
[23 Aug 2005|12:43am] |
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mood |
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 ditzy |
] |
I'm sure I've mentioned before that I'm Webmaster for The Stinger... but I have I mentioned I'm also only slightly more intelligent than a jar of mayonaise?
I tell our Photo Editor, Sam, that I need a picture of everyone on staff to update the web page with (we have a lot of new people this year). Sam comes over and holds up his camera... being pretty leery of accidentally being in pictures, I skitter back in the wheely chair, figuring he's trying to take a picture of Julia or Kayla, who were sitting on the other side of me, and I hate to be in the way.
He stared at me for a moment... "Um."
"Yes?"
"...picture."
"You finished taking them?"
"Picture. You. Camera. *makes a sliding chair motion with his hands*"
"...oh."
...oops.
In other news, I need to be awake in five hours, so off to bed I go. Goodnight, lovelies.
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| Hi there. |
[22 Aug 2005|04:30pm] |
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mood |
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 worried |
] |
As some have you may have noticed, this hasn't been updated regularly in a long time. In an attempt to resolve that, I'm going to start leaving the tab up and making an effort to post at least once every couple of days.
We found my iPod this weekend- yes, the one that's been missing since Spring Break, the shiny 4th Gen 20gig I recieved for my birthday last year. Unfortunately, we found it while moving furniture, trapped under my mother's armchair. The LCD is smashed, the front casing badly dented and scratched, and the back casing dented, bent, warped, and buckling. I have no clue as to the condition of the battery, the hard drive, or either of the ports, but from what I see, they appear to be undamaged... though that doesn't really help me much at all, now does it? :/
As some of you may also know, I'm working as Graphic Designer/Webmaster/Standing Items Coordinator for The Stinger, which is Irmo High School's award-winning monthly newspaper established 1965. What I doubt many of you know is that The Stinger is seriously hurting for funds right now. With a new principal and a canceled grant, we have virtually no money coming in. That means no money for paper, ink, or computers for the new staff members to work on, no cameras for the photographers, no money to take the paper to get printed, and, furthermore, no tolerance for those slacking on their ad selling.
For those of you not familiar with our ad quota, we are required to raise $600 total in patron donations or ads by the end of the year to help The Stinger stay alive. Funds are so nonexistent right now that we are over $800 in the red, and our half-quota deadline has been bumped from December to September, with the reminder that if the $300 is not met by September 15th, we are off staff. No exceptions.
Anyway, the point I'm getting to is that, if you would like to help, either by purchasing an adspace for your company or becoming a patron, I NEED YOUR HELP. Every little bit counts. If you want my eternal love and devotion, you can email me at DJ.Inari@gmail.com and request a patron sheet or the rate sheet for ads. All patrons will recieve their name in the paper and an issue each month mailed to them. All advertisers recieve a copy of the month that contains their advertisement.
If you would like to help, please donate by clicking here. I love you all, but I love being with The Stinger too- please help if you can.
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| . . . |
[16 Aug 2005|12:00am] |
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mood |
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 loved |
] |
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music |
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Counting Crows - Accidentally in Love |
] |
At this moment I am happier than I have ever been before in my life.
This time, I'm not just imagining it.
I think I love you.
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[05 Jul 2005|10:03pm] |
Your Birthdate: September 16 |
Your birth on the 16th day of the month gives a sense of loneliness and generally the desire to work alone.
You are relatively inflexible, and insist on your being independent.
You need a good deal of time to rest and to meditate.
You are introspective and a little stubborn.
Because of this, it may not be easy for you to maintain permanent relationships, but you probably will as you are very much into home and family.
This birth day inclines to interests in the technical, the scientific, and to the religious or the unknown realm of spiritual explorations.
The date gives you a tendency to seek unusual approaches and makes your style seem a little different and unique to those around you.
Your intuition is aided by the day of your birth, but most of your actions are bedded in logic, responsibility, and the rational approach.
You may be emotional, but have a hard time expressing these emotions.
Because of this, there may be some difficulty in giving or receiving affection. |
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| Friends Only |
[01 Jul 2005|02:41pm] |
This is now a friends-only journal. Leave a reply identifying yourself if you wish to be added to my friends list.
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| And now, a song. Today I'm a post whore. |
[09 May 2005|11:43am] |
This was my first ever bright eyes song. Lately, it's been running through my head...
The phone slips from a loose grip.
Words were missed then, some apology...
I didn?t want to tell you this;
No, it?s just some guy she's been hanging out with...
I don?t know, the past couple weeks I guess...
Well, thank you and hang up the phone,
Let the funeral start,
Hear the casket close,
Let?s pin split-black ribbon to your overcoat...
Well, laughter pours from under doors;
In this house, I don?t understand that sound no more.
It seems artificial, like a T.V. set...
Well, haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh;
This weight it must be satisfied
You offer only one reply:
You know not what you do.
But you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed now
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
Well ha ha ha
I remember everything
The words we spoke on freezing South Street
And all those mornings watching you get ready for school
You combed your hair inside that mirror
The one you painted blue and glued with jewelry tears
Something about those bright colors
would always make you feel better
But now we speak with ruined tongues
And the words we say aren?t meant for anyone
It?s just a mumbled sentence to a passing acquaintance
But there was once you
You said you hate my suffering
And you understood
And you?d take care of me
You'd always be there
Well where are you now?
Haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh
The plans were never finalized
But left to hang like yarn and twine
Dangling before my eyes
As you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed now
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
And I sing and sing of awful things
The pleasure that my sadness brings
As my fingers press onto the strings
In yet another clumsy chord
Haligh, haligh, an awful lie
This weight will now be satisfied
I'm gonna give you only one reply
I know not who I am
But I talk in the mirror
To the stranger that appears
Our conversations are circles
Always one sided
Nothing is clear
Except we keep coming back
To this meaning that I lack
He says the choices were given
Now you must live them
Or just not live
But do you want that?
And now, for comparison, translated to french, then german, then spanish, then french, then back to english.
Or not, since the school nazi filter has blocked systran. Grr.
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| la la la. |
[09 May 2005|11:38am] |
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I stabbed myself in the eye with my mascara.
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| Quiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz! |
[09 May 2005|09:30am] |
I'm sort of down this morning, but I'll get over it. I spoke to my friend Hotwire for the first time on the phone today. He sounds just like Adam, except a little more american. How weird is that?
And I keep chewing on my lip ring. It feels weird.
Quizzes!
( Read more... )
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[09 May 2005|08:49am] |
Your True Birth Month Is July |
Tactful
Honest
Friendly
Secretive
Homebody
Sentimental
Hardworking
Approachable
Fun to be with
Has reputation
Not revengeful
Easily consoled
Very emotional
Wary and sharp
Waits for friends
Likes to be quiet
Witty and snarky
Caring and loving
Loves to be alone
Overly concerned
Loves to be loved
Treats others equally
Puts in effort in work
Takes pride in oneself
Moody and easily hurt
No difficulties in studying
Strong sense of sympathy
Forgiving but never forgets
Quiet unless excited or tensed
Not aggressive unless provoked
Concerned about people's feelings
Temperamental and unpredictable
Judge people through observations
Easily hurt but takes long to recover
Guides others physically and mentally
Dislikes the nonsensical and unnecessary
Difficult to fathom and to be understood
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully
Always broods about the past and the old friends
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[09 May 2005|08:46am] |
Your Linguistic Profile:
|
70% General American English |
15% Yankee |
10% Dixie |
5% Upper Midwestern |
0% Midwestern |
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[09 May 2005|08:43am] |
You Are Depressed |
No doubt about it, you're feeling very down.
Maybe you've had a bad day, or maybe you need help.
Either way, make sure to take good care of yourself right now. |
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[09 May 2005|08:33am] |
Your Birthdate: September 16 |
Your birth on the 16th day of the month gives a sense of loneliness and generally the desire to work alone.
You are relatively inflexible, and insist on your being independent.
You need a good deal of time to rest and to meditate.
You are introspective and a little stubborn.
Because of this, it may not be easy for you to maintain permanent relationships, but you probably will as you are very much into home and family.
This birth day inclines to interests in the technical, the scientific, and to the religious or the unknown realm of spiritual explorations.
The date gives you a tendency to seek unusual approaches and makes your style seem a little different and unique to those around you.
Your intuition is aided by the day of your birth, but most of your actions are bedded in logic, responsibility, and the rational approach.
You may be emotional, but have a hard time expressing these emotions.
Because of this, there may be some difficulty in giving or receiving affection. |
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[09 May 2005|08:29am] |
Your #1 Match: INFP
|
The Idealist
You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world.
Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships.
It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close.
But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.
You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist. |
Your #2 Match: INTP
|
The Thinker
You are analytical and logical - and on a quest to learn everything you can.
Smart and complex, you always love a new intellectual challenge.
Your biggest pet peeve is people who slow you down with trivial chit chat.
A quiet maverick, you tend to ignore rules and authority whenever you feel like it.
You would make an excellent mathematician, programmer, or professor. |
Your #3 Match: ISFP
|
The Artist
You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now).
You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children.
Simply put, you enjoy bueaty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life.
Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs.
You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer. |
Your #4 Match: ISTP
|
The Mechanic
You are calm and collected, even in the most difficult of situations.
A person of action and self-direction, you love being independent.
To outsiders yous eem impulsive, surprising, and unpredictable.
You are good at understanding how all things work, except for people.
You would make an excellent pilot, forensic pathologist, or athlete. |
Your #5 Match: INFJ
|
The Protector
You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity.
Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is.
You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience.
You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them.
You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher. |
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[09 May 2005|06:48am] |
The Keys to Your Heart
|
You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart. |
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you. |
You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. |
You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance. |
Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love. |
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. |
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. |
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
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[04 May 2005|05:18pm] |
Freaks are the much needed escape from the humdrum. They are poetry.
- Albert Perry, Tattoo (1933)
My body is a journal in a way. It's like what sailors used to do, where every tattoo meant something, a specific time in your life when you make a mark on yourself, whether you do it yourself with a knife or with a professional tattoo artist.
- Johnny Depp
I feel that some piercings reflect the personality, and those are more like haircuts or styles of clothing that you embrace. Other piercings are supposed to be there. When you look in the mirror you don't look different so much as same somehow, as if it has been there all along.
- Jon Cobb (1997)
The mind's first step to self-awareness must be through the body.
- George Sheehan
The bodyart crowd is a loving, highly intelligent group, despite public opinion. Tattoos do not instantly mean convict. In this instance, they mean "computer geek."
- Keith Alexander, RABcon98
You may lose your most valuable property through mistfortune in various ways. You may lose your house, your wife and other treasures. But of your moko, you cannot be deprived except by death. It will be your ornament and companion until your last day.
- Netana Whakaari of Waimana (1921)
Every man is the builder of a temple, called his body, to the god he worships, after a style purely his own, nor can he get off by hammering marble instead. We are all sculptors and painters, and our material is our own flesh and blood and bones. Any nobleness begins at once to refine a man's features, any meanness or sensuality to imbrute them.
- Henry David Thoreau, Walden (1862)
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[02 May 2005|07:34pm] |
Your brain: 40% interpersonal, 120% visual, 100% verbal, and 140% mathematical!
| Congratulations on being 400% smart! Actually, on my test, everyone is. The above score breaks down what kind of thinking you most enjoy
doing. A score above 100% means you use that kind of thinking more than
average, and a score below 100% means you use it less. It says nothing
about how good you are at any one, just how interested you are in each, relatively. A substantial difference in scores between two people means, conclusively, that they are different kinds of thinkers.
Matching Summary: Each of us has different tastes. Still, I offer the following advice, which I think is obvious:
- Don't date someone if your interpersonal percentages differ by more than 80%.
- Don't be friends with someone if your verbal percentages differ by more than 100%.
- Don't have sex with someone if their math percentage is over 200%.
|  |
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: | You scored higher than 55% on interpersonal | | You scored higher than 79% on visual | | You scored higher than 82% on verbal | | You scored higher than 80% on mathematical |
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[23 Apr 2005|03:30pm] |
1. Take the lyrics to a favorite song.
2. Go to Google Language Tools, tranlate the lyrics into German, then from German to French, andfinally from French back into English.
3. Post the results verbatim.
4. Invite friends to guess the song based on the interesting new lyrics.
headstocks tested ive which were guaranteed to sixteen or under any was not sorta that a rail of puddle pool or Whacking very examment receives you far they' ll far however it' S which has not been right the true thing its decades for my days of well be however I cut agitated him - that sat like an Idiot correction there still in the Punkprotokoll old man and dreaming that the young people that i' m thinks a radical and I, still wait until the bus, where High still expecting to find the love right under which skateboarders which hang outside in the back of the bank in my birthplace has and no action' S to receive me rigid of Tit to the bone if in alive in lala country - but in at least not the house living that same old women flutes the same chemical old men the same Thrills old men that socks of EinkaufenMall steal its simple enough to raise happy Bumsen with the rough cut nobodys in the market for a diamond in the rough one however I wait nor whom my Mamma comes to bring to me holly' S to the house 10 years after they took it inside, to form a multilot for A, seven-eleven and Burgerkoenig of the received secret codes i' ve i' ve did not receive all enough wish me incontestably are good, of the cakes and of the diagrams slightly, me my arithmetic with the last teach. a better cable receives the people dangerously - i' m on coward to receive again and more ridiculously, I that more I think must outside my understanding Kid received (it' S who, Amanda, god - you' Re being rather old fucking to be inside...) my clean road private of device of admission with tomb me stores package, age average and Saturdays jumps and me still that it waits, that axes come, where the station since to the bottom bunred still convinces until they' ll for all the sins brings to me, fixed to me in the back of Pickup.truck geschlagenen-oben i' ve the scene races of curtain and the coating back of leather require the marks of you... me all around an individual proof received more i' ve Umhuellungsaccharinpakete which drain black with kisses of pin of lip I, still wait until the bus, where High School heruntergerissen still expecting to find the love right under which sakteboarders which hang outside in the back of the bank in my house received turns over i' m no to require was not pederast thanks gentillement, however i' m which is not equipped able to rise and to receive love' S which I wish enough am good, of Fotographien slightly whose test is... time in city still OH- god i' m thirty No, i' m 10 i' m seventeen and one bank of Boston beauty queen....
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